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Raise Those Theta Perceptics Via Craigslist

'Morristown for Sale' returns!

Welcome back, old friend.

We have been away from "Morristown for Sale," that no doubt there is plenty of fresh ground to cover, plenty of oddities being sold by your neighbors which should—nay, must—get their due. Let's do it.

  1. It Kind of Defeats the Purpose, Doesn't It? Anyone not without a generator, candles, flashlights or hurricane lanterns may have been cursing their lack of preparation a couple weeks ago. And, had they been half-reading this ad before making the purchase, they may have cursed their distracted nature. Still, the top and bottom of this "electrified" hurricane lantern do light independently of each other. That's cool. And, at $50, you can have it for a cool price (who dictates temperature ranges for currency anyway?).
  2. If the Power Goes Out on Your Electrified Hurricane Lantern: You could always pick up some of this free firewood, over on Walker Avenue in Morristown. The best part, according to this ad: no dogs!
  3. Look Into This Michelob-brand Mirror and Ask Yourself ... Should I be living the "High Life" instead? At $40, you could afford to get this and still have enough for a six of whatever beer you so desire.
  4. If You Love Tom Cruise, or Looking to Get Those Theta Perceptics up a few Notches: You could always take this collection of L. Ron Hubbard's finest off this person's hands, as they are moving. All this Scientology satisfaction, all for $75.
  5. Or, You Can Buy Hamsters: Only $8 each, as the seller has eight too many. Eight is great.

 

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